When I behold the frightening visage of Kellyanne Conway, I feel disturbed. Why? It’s not her tendency to lie and dissemble that bothers me so much. It’s not her role as Trump’s surrogate, ass blower, and media buffer. It’s not even her politics, as divisive and bigoted as they are.

What bothers me most about Kellyanne Conway is her face. And, maybe, what bothers me most about her face is the voice I hear whenever she parts that dry, papery, recently-shellacked rictus permanently carved into her cadaverous head. She’s Cruella DeVille voiced by Rainbow Brite, and she just makes my skin crawl.